The College Board is out to get President Trump. If you took the AP Macroeconomics exam earlier this month and were able to focus on anything but the brown mouse darting around the Community Room, you might’ve realized that the exam writers took some not-so-subtle shots at Trump’s tariffs.

 The Free Response section of the exam mentioned the storied nation of Vortania: a country whose government decided to upend their free-trade relationship with their neighbor, Rhodara, by instituting new tariffs on imports. Exam takers then drew graphs showing Vortanian exports tumbling, domestic employment nosediving and real GDP plummeting. The people of Vortania became unhappy at having to pay more; the central bank adjusted monetary policy accordingly.

 Sound familiar? Recently, at the Upper School, we discussed Trump’s reciprocal tariffs in shared advisories. Reception was mixed. I hear some groups skipped the Kahoot to watch “High School Quiz Show.” My advisory chose to wax poetic about Jayson Tatum after his Achilles tear — the real American crisis, if you ask me — rather than drone on about the 145% tariff on Chinese goods.

 See, most people feel that tariffs — especially those presented by Trump as he beams at a cardboard chart of all the havoc he plans to wreak — are bad but don’t really know why. In the limited bits of productive conversation that Dr. Scrivner and Ms. Agostinelli were able to coax out from students mourning the Celtics’ back-to-back title hopes, one thing stood out: Teenagers, like their parents, aren’t happy about paying more for previously-cheap SHEIN clothes. I guess “protecting American domestic production” means less to people when their pockets get lighter and lighter, and that new handbag just looks too good to pass up.

“At this point, bring on the tariffs! Then, at least, I can plan to pivot to a hearty American breakfast instead of that expensive Canadian stuff.”

 On top of that, the adults in the room don’t like the uncertainty and volatility Trump’s tariffs have brought to the table. I’d like to know if the price of the maple syrup for my morning pancakes is going up or down. Is it going to cost $10 like usual, or am I going to pay twice as much in duties? In this vein, I ask that President Trump make up his mind. Either make and keep them, or forget about them as a whole. At this point, bring on the tariffs! Then, at least, I can plan to pivot to a hearty American breakfast instead of that expensive Canadian stuff. Guess I’ll just listen to the President, who tells me to “EAT THE TARIFFS!”

 Back to Econ 101, though. One of the first things you learn in any introductory macro class is that, generally, trade is good. It’s not hard to understand. If someone else can make something faster, better or more efficiently than you can, maybe it’s better to buy it cheaply from them rather than burn resources trying to do it yourself. Tariffs make it harder to buy cheaply from someone else. They could be useful if you’re trying to protect an infant industry or protect production critical to national security. Guess how Trump’s using them, though? Certainly not in a productive way. Instead, his “Liberation Day” blanket tariffs imposed a 10% tax on anything and everything from some of our most common trade partners. You pay more, I pay more, we all pay more! Democracy!

 I’m no expert economist, so take everything I just said with a massive grain of salt. I’ll admit that I’m also guilty of tuning out the tariff talk whenever mentioned. I have zero clue about which countries we’ve paused tariffs on and which ones we’re still tariffing. It’s some confusing stuff.

 I wish I could sever my consciousness into two: a tariff-conscious version capable of critical thinking about this stuff and another AP-exhausted, early-onset-senioritis-infected alter-ego. Alas, I cannot. However, the Econ exam and I can tell you that perhaps dangling blanket tariffs over your citizens’ heads isn’t the “4-D chess” move that our nation’s brilliant QAnon economists would like you to believe.

 If high schoolers with less than a year of economics knowledge can tell you that sweeping reciprocal tariffs aren’t the best idea, perhaps our Wharton-educated president should be able to as well.